Music Challenge Day #9

Songs that make you Cry

I already compiled this list a while ago here... but I forgot some...

and

and sometimes

Music Challenge Day #8

A Song That Makes You Wanna Dance

So if you know me, you know I don't dance unless I'm filled with liquor.
This is the only song I could think of that I would "dance" to when I was a kid. As this song played, my sister and I would race around the living room, filled with glee.  I think we were 10 and 4? maybe... i dunno.. that's all

Music Challenge Day #6 (update)

an updated theme song for my life that makes more sense and is more accurate.

Mama told me when I was young
Come sit beside me, my only son
And listen closely to what I say
And if you do this it'll help you some sunny day

Oh, take your time don't live too fast
Troubles will come and they will pass
Go find a woman you'll find love
And don't forget son there is someone up above

And be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me son if you can?

Forget your lust for the rich man's gold
All that you need is in your soul
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you my son is to be satisfied
(From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/l/lynyrd-skynyrd-lyrics/simple-man-lyrics.html)

And be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me son if you can? Oh yes, I will

Boy, don't you worry you'll find yourself
Follow your heart and nothing else
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you my son is to be satisfied

And be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me son if you can?

Baby be a simple, be a simple man
Be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man

Music Challenge Day #7

A Song That Makes You Think of Someone You Miss


I have two songs that made me kinda miss the same person. Jared and I used to go to the beach for what seemed like every weekend one summer. We would take turns driving. When i would drive we would listen to the Best of the Beach Boys and this one song makes me think of those times.

The times that he would drive we would have the Big Tymers to listen to ... (he was a wigger). I don't know the name of the exact song, but this song is off the same album I think. The song in my head had some weird sounds that made it sound unintentionally like PacMan, which i would constantly remind him of. I hated the music, but it was part of the beach trip. Going to Oceanside, playing catch, drinking Smirnoff Ice (lol), and then stopping at McDonalds in Bonsall for Big Macs and nuggets and to play some Mario Golf on the N64 they had there... some of the best times of my life

Music Challenge Day #6

A Theme Song for Your Life

ok I think I missed a day, so I shall make it up now.
I thought about saving this one for the end so I had more time to think about all the songs out there. But I remembered a song off the top of my head right now, so I guess I'll stick with it.

When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell I'm doing here?
I don't belong here

She's running out the door
She's running out
She runs runs runs

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

Music Challenge Day #5

What is the song of your favorite TV show?


Originally I thought this meant currently... in which case you'd see Family Guy or Scrubs or Married with Children.. but as I searched my past, I realized what it was.... I'm just gonna post a link to the song and if you can't identify the show, we can't be homies... A show that had great music and gave, what I feel, was an accurate representation of the time and the hurdles every kid seems to go through... enjoy


Joe Cocker

Music Challenge Day #4

What Song Do You Absolutely Have to Listen to Everyday

I don't really have a song I need to listen to everyday, but I'm currently trying to learn a new song and consequently find myself listening to it as much as possible. It's what I do when trying to learn a song. It's just like anything else; I need repetition to remember and to pick up on little nuances... ESPECIALLY with this song... it's a little different than what I usually listen to, but one of my favorite bands right now.

Music Challenge Day #3

A Song That Can Change Your Mood Instantly

The Ecstasy of Gold + Creeping Death - Metallica

The Ecstasy of Gold is  the intro song Metallica has used to open up their shows for a while now.

I didn't really know when I went to go see Metallica in 2004, and it was probably better that way. It's the perfect song to open up a show you know is just going to kick your ass. It starts out innocent and unassuming but by the time it runs it course and crescendos at the end, you're ready to just let loose. To do this alone on youtube is one thing, but to do it with 50-70,00 other fans, it's an experience that cannot be replicated with anything. It turned the quiet, reserved guy that is me, into a yelling, screaming, singing lunatic (although when I saw them they followed up with my favorite song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHIEO1_0Ulo). And that lasted for the whole 3+ hour show. So naturally when this comes on, I get a boost in energy and my mood takes a turn for the better.

Music Challenge Day #2

A Song That Reminds You of the One You Love

Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts? 
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground. 
What have you found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here

This song can probably be interpreted in a hundred different ways, and depending on my mood, I can interpret it differently than I do currently. 

This is basically a summarization of what I will call my "love life" up to this point; a series of people who think the grass is greener elsewhere. When I love, I give it everything I have. Maybe that's what I'm not understanding, that what I "have", just isn't good enough. 

Music Challenge Day #1

What song did you listen to on your way to work/school:


There were two songs I listened to today because I'm trying to learn them. My commute isn't too long so I only got to listen to both twice.

First: Parkway Drive - Romance is Dead (and i'll give u live videos cuz why not)

The incisions is your wrist were all for show.
Just like you.
He epitome of self indulgence.
Another farce.
A charade and another set of crocodile tears.
So serenade her with your last pathetic suicide love song.
"Broken hearts never mend".
But fools never move one.
And now she's gone because of you.
And once again You're the epitome of pure self destruction.
Cupid never found his mark.
As we await the insertion of blades on flesh.
You part the skin and tell of blades on blood.
So part the fucking skin.
To tell the blades on blood.
She said "I Love You"
She said.
She said goodbye.
So cry me a fucking river bitch.
You wouldn't know love if it crushed you fucking chest.
Let go.
You wouldn't know love if it crushed your fucking chest.
"Razors, roses and a black tomorrow"
They never showed any affection to anything but your ego.
A tragedy of errors at the best of times.
You are everything that's wrong with me.
Youre everything that I despise.
You are everything I dreamed would die.
You are everything that fades away and slowly dies.
Will you bleed for me when suicide seems so yesterday?
Will you bleed for me?
Will you fucking bleed for me when suicide...
It's so yesterday.
It's all so fucking yesterday

Second: Parkway Drive - Mutiny

The deepest circle of Hell is reserved for betrayers and mutiniers.

Fucked up memories.
We're dead at every turn.
So spin your fucking shit and we'll die with every twist of tongue.
Your hollow gaze has shifted past my eyes.
Another dead face fades away.
Now what's left to take?
Another day I regret your memory.
In my mind you will never be more that this.
So what's left to fucking take?
Now my trust is gone.
As your world comes crashing down I'm going to watch it fucking burn.
Everything we had lies in pieces.
Everything we had fucking dies... tonight.
Through those deceiving eyes I've seen the blackest heart.
The blackest heart.
Everything you love fucking dies tonight.

Why I'm a Dodgers Fan...

This was the birth of a Dodgers fan. I was 6 years old and I watched this game with my dad. At the time I didn't understand the significance of this moment, I saw my dad's reaction and I knew something big had happened. And so, as any boy wants to be like his dad, I became a Dodger fan. I grew up in LaHabra until I was 5 and had been an Angels fan because it was convenient. This one video (and I wish I could find the whole back story video to this moment) never fails to make me misty-eyed. What Kirk Gibson meant to the Dodgers this particular year, and what this home run meant for the Dodgers in this World Series makes this moment really heavy. He was the league MVP and in the playoff series before this, he hit a homerun and to keep the Dodgers alive, and then hurt his already ailing knee further. So in this at-bat, he's come out of the dugout after not playing the whole game and the whole at bat he is having trouble just standing and this was his first and only at-bat in the World Series. This moment is iconic in baseball and Dodger history. Any time this is being relived on TV I stop and watch.

These next two videos are from the same game, but the series of events is so unpredictable that you can't find one video with everything in it. I wish I could find actual footage, but this is the best I could find, which really is better for showing the raw emotion in the stadium that night. I don't remember the significance of this game, it may have been a meaningless game, but the opponent (Padres) coupled with what happened makes this huge. At the beginning of the 1st video the Dodgers are losing 9-5 in the bottom of the 9th and the Padres are basically just going through the motions to close out the game. The Dodgers then hit 4 consecutive homeruns to tie the game, and then in the 2nd video, they hit a home run in the bottom of the 10th inning to win the game. 

Besides all of this, I like the Dodgers because they are almost always the underdogs, they are almost always counted out, they almost always underachieve, and because they're on the west coast, don't get a lot of media attention. I like that the stadium is a 'baseball' stadium. No playgrounds, no pools, no extra curricular activities in the stadium. When you go to Dodger Stadium, you're going to watch a baseball game and nothing else. It's the same reason I respect Red Sox, Yankees, and Cubs fans. You can tell they show up to watch the game and they know the rules well. They know game situations and pick up on things much faster than the casual fan that may go to a game. 
Apart from having one of the most storied franchises and oldest stadiums, the Dodgers posses one of the best announcers in all of sports who has been broadcasting games for over 50 years. 
Simple colors, simple uniform, simple logo. 

...in the mirror

I don't hate you... I hate what you've become and miss who you were. I hate the way you've allowed yourself to get treated and I hate that you don't do anything about it. You're weak and timid and second guess every decision and feeling you have and that's not who you are. You have nothing to offer anybody at this point. What does someone get out of knowing you? Loving you? Caring about you? The easy answer.... nothing. That's what you've become... nothing. Obviously you being at your best, isn't good enough. Who you are isn't good enough. So at this point, go through the motions. Try not to jeopardize anyone else's future/life. Shut up, do what you're told. Don't show emotion. Don't have opinions. Don't do anything but 'be'. And just wait in agony.

bleh

Ok, after some 140 character or less banter via Twitter the other day, I felt I had a lot to say and wish I could have spoken my mind immediately and more off the cuff than I am now, a few days later, after I've had plenty of time to think and forget all the shit I wanted to say originally.

We'll start with this; I believe in the idea of marriage. I believe in what it stands for. I like the idea of being in love, and having someone love you in return just as much. I like the idea of having someone by your side whom respects you and would do anything for you... to inherit another family as your own and someone to share all your dreams, successes, failures and accomplishments with. I envy those old couples you see that have been together after -X- number of years and they still seem to be as in love as the day they met. 

As ideal as that scenario sounds, I also believe those types of marriages are based on the type of living that was promoted in that time. Times have changed and so has marriage. The divorce rate has quadrupled from 5% in the 50's to the 20% currently reported in the U.S. And that's not even counting the unions where both people involved are so completely unhappy and so miserable that they would turn and run if not for circumstances within the marriage such as the kids (which is not a justified reason to stay married). In the 50's it was frowned upon to divorce or to give up or to not see your marriage through. Today, with it being more commonplace, you have to be more careful who you marry, not marry at all, or make your own rules (such as open marriages or polygamy). 

In the few long term relationships I've had plus my marriage, I've been compiling a mental list of things that prospective consumers buying in to the marriage game should consider:

• Evaluate Yourself - Can you survive the rigors, trials and tribulations of giving half of your life over to someone? Can you roll with the punches and keep your cool, be faithful, giving, trusting, and an all around selfless person for your spouse? Have you done everything you want to do that marriage may prohibit or make difficult? Most important here, is to not bullshit yourself. Don't talk yourself into believing you can be or do any of these things if you either A) never have or B) think these standards are temporary.
• Evaluate Your Significant Other - Is this someone you have proven you CAN live with? And is this someone that has proven they can live with you? Mimicking a marital situation before sealing the deal is almost mandatory. So much changes when you're suddenly living under the same roof as someone else no matter the amount of "love" there is. Have they answered all of the questions above or is there still some lingering doubt? 
• Trust - There HAS HAS HAS to be trust. Don't ever give your partner a reason to doubt you even for a second. The time for making him/her jealous and playing hard-to-get is over. Entering into marriage with trust issues already in place is like jumping in the ocean without knowing how to swim.
• Respect - I think some people think that once you're married to someone that you all of a sudden "own" them and can treat them a little worse than you did before. If you spouse is constantly bad-mouthing you to his/her family, whether in jest or not, that is a huge red flag. That shows that they don't think too highly of you  and, in their mind, are putting you in your place and want everyone else to know who's in charge. A marriage should be 100% 50/50 with each person's feelings and opinions taken into account and equal amounts of importance placed on each. Lack of respect will breed resentment and hatred and pretty soon you'll end up living with someone who is overly aggressive to compensate for the lack of respect or at best a Larry (see entry named "Larry"). Don't be with someone who will, more often than not, tell you what to do, tell you how you feel, or try and be a psychic and tell you what you will do in a given situation.
• Sex - This seems like a no-brainer, but if there's no sex, no sexual compromise, or sexual dissatisfaction, bail. This kind of falls under the two previous categories but is so important it warrants its own section. While marriage isn't all about sex, sex is the glue that will hold two people together. Sex needs to be fun and adventurous. The idea that sex gets boring after marriage is a common misconception. It’s probably more accurate to say that you get bored with your spouse; seeing the same naked person, doing the same things, in the same place. You’re not necessarily bored with sex, you’re just bored with the staleness within your sex life. If you’ve gotten to this point, you have to tap in to your, and your spouse’s, adventurous side. Sex doesn’t always have to be in the bedroom. Hell, it doesn’t always have to be in the house, or in A house. Find a secluded place to have sex outdoors; relive your glory days and jump in the back seat of your car; go to a boring movie on a weekday afternoon and see what you can get away with in the theater; jump into the bathroom for a quickie at a family get-together; never underestimate the power of a hj/bj while driving; playful, but discreet touching in public throughout the day… just enough to tease and drive your spouse crazy; introduce toys or costumes or lubes or candy or adult movies into the bedroom, whatever it takes. Sex getting boring probably has as much to do with being lazy as it does with trying the same tired routine. As much fun and exciting as sex is, it can still become work if you let it. It needs to stay fun and positive, a weapon to use against the stresses of everyday life.
• Don't Lose Your Identity - As long as you're not a serial killer or woman abuser, there shouldn't be a laundry list of things you should have to change to make yourself marriage material. If you're constantly being judged and criticized for who you are, what you do, your background, your mannerisms... it's not worth it and won't work out anyways. If you're told your hair, clothes, job, hygiene (as long as you're not disgusting), car, taste in food, music, TV, hobbies, or even the way you hold a beer, they don't have much interest in WHO you are and they won't accept you until you try to compromise who you are.
• Common Sense - Don't be love-blind. Don't make decisions with your heart. Make sure you both want the same thing out of life and that you are both able to stay committed. You don't want someone taking the time effort their supposed to be using on your relationship and applying it elsewhere. When the time comes that the relationship starts to dissolve, you will receive just as, much blame. As much as marriage is all about being in love and starting a family and all that mushy crap, it's just as much a business transaction. You're giving half of yourself away to someone else. Weigh pros and cons, ask outsiders for an objective point of view, and most of all, be honest with yourself. Make sure you aren't selling yourself short and make sure the person you wanna be with is committed to the game.

There ARE other options to marriage if you don't think it's for you. Find someone you love, have a life with them, but have a pre-existing agreement where you can each go your separate ways if the relationship goes south.
Be in an open marriage or polygamist relationship. As long as you can handle the emotional end of this, then this is probably one of the more popular options. I for one, am not a good candidate for this way of living. If i have feelings for someone, I don't want to share and it kills me to think of them with anybody else.
Or just simply stay single. Date and hook-up and if something comes along, then so-be-it. Don't force things, don't expect things, and just have fun in life. Get the most you can out of life, live for yourself, and do everything you wanna do.

I guess, in closing, I'm just suggesting that I think it's time to leave these archaic and outdated ideals behind in favor of a more modern approach.
Society should be more open to alternative types of lifestyles, relationships, and ways of living. Marriage doesn't always have to be the "way it's supposed to be"... even though I'm guilty of having that exact outlook. We should just keep an open mind and think outside the box.

this is how it feels